By Onell R. Soto

A San Bernardino County man was sentenced to five years in federal prison yesterday for cheating men out of more than $1 million in a Russian bride scam.

The sentence was imposed from an April plea bargain in which Robert McCoy, 40, of Rancho Cucamonga admitted defrauding more than 250 men and agreed to pay back his victims $737,521. Prosecutors dropped other charges.

Investigators positively identified 352 victims, but there may be more, said San Diego-based federal prosecutor Richard Cheng.

Anna Grountovaia, 32, McCoy’s wife and the mother of his 2-year-old daughter, was sentenced to three years probation after having served 11 months in jail.

Grountovaia, a Russian who met McCoy through the Internet before moving into his home, said she posed as a prospective bride in telephone calls with some of the victims, including several San Diego men. She pleaded guilty to fraud and may be deported.

She met him after the scam was already under way and didn’t play a big part in the scam, filling in when he needed a woman with a Russian accent, her lawyer said.

Most of the victims spoke with women in Russia, lawyer Timothy Scott said in court papers.

McCoy is a drug-addicted felon who sports gang tattoos and has earlier convictions on assault, kidnapping and weapons charges, according to court papers.

In court filings, prosecutor Cheng detailed the scheme this way:

McCoy met his victims through personal ads he placed or answered on Web sites including America Online and Match.com.

In each case, he wrote e-mails posing as a Russian woman seeking love and sent pictures of a pretty model.

Eventually, a visit would be arranged, and the victim was told a Russian dating service needed about $1,800 to pay for a visa and plane tickets.

On the day the victim was expecting the woman to arrive, McCoy would write as an official from the fictitious dating service and said there was a problem: A new regulation required the woman to carry $1,500 cash to enter the United States.

The service would lend her $500, but the victim needed to wire an additional $1,000.

The men learned they were taken days later, when their e-mails were ignored or bounced back because the accounts were closed.

The FBI began investigating the scam after a Baltimore man told a London newspaper about the scheme.

McCoy regrets what he did and plans to use his prison time to get off drugs, said his lawyer, Arthur Greenspan, who blamed the drug addiction as a big reason for McCoy’s behavior.

A Web site on Russian scams tells prospective suitors to beware any woman who asks for money after an online meeting.

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But being in love with someone in another city, state, or country doesn’t mean that the relationship must unduly suffer. You and your partner can make it work—using creativity, communication, and technology. However, these three things can do nothing either separately or as a combination unless the relationship possesses a final, vital element: trust.

Communication, as the glue for any relationship, is especially important for two lovers who are unable to snuggle, kiss, hold hands, or make love on a regular basis. For long distance relationships, this communication must come mostly in verbal form. Of course, no person can hope to make up for the missing physical affection through mail or the internet, but care and attention can be shown through other means. Surprise gifts are always nice, though they don’t have to be extravagant to say, “I’m thinking of you.” An even more personal token for your lover is a garment (or piece of jewelry) of your own that can be sent through the mail in your stead—something that can either be worn as a reminder or symbol of loyalty, or a garment that carries your special cologne or perfume fragrance. For daily communication, emails, instant messages, and phone calls are ideal, but nothing beats a carefully-worded love letter devoted to fantasies and sexy innuendos, even given the time it may take to reach your lover. And don’t forget the miracle of web cams, which can get you as close to your partner as you can get without being face-to-face. Plan a conversation or tease session using web cams and microphones to close the space.

While you must focus on your lover, it isn’t always healthy to focus only on him or her. This can lead to discontent, restlessness, and an urge to stray. Have other hobbies, interests, and friends. Take yourself out or enjoy a platonic dinner or drink with a person with whom you share a rapport. Keep your mind occupied with other things you care about.

In addition, make sure that stress does not prevent you from staying true to your intentions where your partner is concerned. Stress can make us do crazy things—argue, clam up, or even cheat. Get enough exercise (telling yourself that your lover is going to worship your shapely, strong body!) and don’t wallow in your own longing for physical affection. Explain your frustrations to your counterpart so that there is no misunderstanding or disagreement about what you are going through personally. It is highly likely that he or she is experiencing the same thing on some level—get it out in the open. While you can’t be physical support for each other, you can be of emotional assistance. Sharing problems becomes a foundation on which you both can grow. After all, overcoming obstacles together can only strengthen what is already there.

To succeed, you and your partner must trust each other, and live up to that trust. It may or may not be easy to do, but without it the relationship will fail later if not sooner. If you and your partner communicate and truly love one another, trust can be an obtainable quality in your relationship. It can be easy to convince yourself that there is “something going on” when you can’t see what your lover is doing. However, any lack of trust will tear the relationship apart in due time, as will your own guilt if you happen to be in the position of betrayer. Taking each day as it comes, concerning yourself more with showing love than suspicion, and encouraging an open conversation on any topic of unease will eliminate the need for mistrust and encourage sincerity.

Surviving a long distance relationship can be a very special thing. The long distance relationship, after the distance has been removed, can be the beginning of a long lasting relationship.

Article source: http://www.trudating.com

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All issues considered, don’t miss out on meeting new and interesting people solely because of safety concerns. Keep in mind that most singles simply have the same goals in mind as you. They want to meet someone special they’re attracted to who happens to possess many of the same qualities. There are ways to increase your level of safety when meeting someone new, and the new friend or date you meet could turn out to be your true soul mate.

Take Your Time

One of the biggest mistakes people make when searching personal ad profiles is getting in too big of a hurry. They see an attractive face and mindlessly begin a correspondence before considering the rest of the profile. When browsing through personals take your time and carefully scrutinize the information provided before replying to or initiating correspondence.

After beginning a correspondence with a dating site friend, keep the lines of communication open and don’t be too quick to meet. Get to know the individual through email, instant messaging and talk on the phone (preferably through an anonymous phone service). Develop somewhat of a relationship before choosing to meet. You may decide to take the next step, or for whatever reason, you may decide that meeting isn’t such a good idea and you’ll be glad you took your time.

Before meeting in person, ask lots of questions and look for inconsistencies. When corresponding through email, instant messaging, or by phone, compare answers to similar questions in an effort to determine whether or not the person is being truthful. If the information doesn’t add up, ask more questions. When carefully questioned, someone who isn’t being totally honest will finally end up backed into a corner, and they won’t be able to talk their way out of it.

Protect Your Privacy

Don’t make the mistake of being too trusting. Although the majority of singles are kind and honest individuals simply looking to meet new people, not everyone has your best interest in mind. Don’t give out your regular email address right off the bat, and don’t provide your home address, phone number, place of employment, or any other personal information until you are completely comfortable with the new person in your life. Where safety is concerned, you can never be too careful!

Sign up for a free web-based email address and an anonymous phone service; use it primarily for correspondence with your new potential dates. If at any time you don’t feel safe, or if someone refuses to take no for an answer, you can easily dump the contact info and sign up for a new one. When combined with the built-in privacy and security features of the online dating website, your identity will be safe and will remain completely secure.

Meeting Locations

Never plan to meet someone at his or her home, in a parking lot, or anywhere else that isn’t a busy public location. Consider meeting inside a restaurant, a shopping mall or a coffee shop. Continue to meet in public places until you feel completely comfortable and until you feel you know the person inside and out.

Always make a friend or loved one aware of exactly where you plan on meeting someone for the very first time and subsequent dates thereafter. Carry your cell phone, and don’t alter you plans without notifying someone who can check on you if need be. Your cell phone is your line of communication and your lifeline of safety when dating someone new.

Trust Your Instincts

Use your instincts to guide you through the exciting and often confusing world of online dating. If at any time something doesn’t feel quite right, don’t proceed. Your inner voice will tell you when something is wrong, but you must keep an open mind in order to perceive it. Take your time; protect your privacy, meet in public places, and most of all, trust your instincts. Your built-in instincts are the most effective tools of protection, no matter where you are or who you meet.

I need the one to spend our lives together loving and supporting each other in any life situation.

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